How to Find the Right Therapist for You

Starting therapy is a big deal. And finding the right therapist? Also a big deal. You are basically picking someone you are going to share your brain and heart with. No pressure, right? 😅

Don’t worry. Here is what to look for when you are therapist shopping (and yes, it is totally okay to be picky).

1. Someone You Actually Like

Sounds obvious, but you should actually like your therapist.
Not in a “let’s be best friends” way, but more like, "I feel okay being real around you."
If you leave sessions feeling judged, uncomfortable, or just super awkward (and not the normal “talking about feelings is weird” awkward), it might not be the right fit.

Trust your gut. If the vibe feels off, it probably is.

2. Someone Who Gets What You Are Going Through

Therapists have different specialties like anxiety, depression, trauma, eating disorders, relationship stuff, you name it.
You would not go to a foot doctor for a sore throat, right? Same idea. Find someone who has experience with what you are dealing with.

Bonus tip: It is totally fine to ask them straight up, “Have you worked with people like me before?”

3. Someone Who Listens, Not Just Talks

A good therapist listens. Like, really listens.
They are not there to lecture you, give you a five-point plan for your life, or make everything about their own theories.
You should feel heard, not talked at.

4. Someone Who Makes You Feel Safe (Even When It Is Hard)

Therapy is not always comfy. Some conversations will stretch you. But you should still feel safe.
Safe to cry. Safe to be messy. Safe to say, “I don’t know.”
If you ever feel shamed, ignored, or like you have to hide parts of yourself, it is okay (and important) to find someone else.

5. Someone Who Is Cool With Feedback

Therapists are not perfect. Sometimes they will say something that does not land right or suggest something that does not work for you. A good therapist will want you to speak up, and they will adjust without making you feel bad about it.

It is your space. Your healing. Your rules.

Finding the right therapist is like finding the right pair of jeans. Sometimes you have to try a few on before you find the one that fits.
Take your time. Ask questions. Trust yourself.

You are allowed to find someone who makes you feel safe, seen, and supported. You deserve that.